Magic Kingdom

Soo....Disneyland. We had a great time although it gets exhausting. It's so perfect and so immaculate, but also so artificial and jam-packed with people, that after a couple of days you kind of feel like you've just wolfed down a giant bucket of ice cream...you gots a gut-ache and a toothache. Anyways, we had two hectic, fun filled days, decided that was enough, and sold our last day of tickets (whoops, sorry Walt) and opted to spend some time doing other things instead.

Day 1 we spent at Disneyland. After our perfect little tram took us from our perfect little Timon & Pumbaa parking lot to the perfect gates, we high-tailed it for Big Thunder Mountain Railroad to start the trip off with a little coaster. We basically did every ride in Disneyland that day, Splash Mountain twice. We were there about 12 hours, with a break to run back to our car to wolf down the food we had packed in the trunk (non-Disney food is strictly verboten within the park). By the time I dragged Edy out of the park at 9 pm, I had had enough Disney.

Day 2: California Adventure. It kind of boggles the mind that Global Mega Disney Corp or whatever it's called these days basically created an entire park the same size as Disneyland (which took 50 years to evolve to the state it is in today) in a year. But they did. And it's beautiful. It's sort of the teenage cousin of Disneyland, with slightly more scary rides. I don't know if it was because it was 9/11 or what, but the park was empty. We didn't have to wait in line for anything. On our first trip down the Grizzly River Run, we shared a raft with a couple from Abbotsford, Char and Brent, who we actually ended up spending the entire day with. It was fun to have company to eat Pineapple Whip with at the Tiki Room. Char and Brent are also, like, Edy, "ride people," so the peer pressure to do scary non-Dani rides was kind of unavoidable. I even ended up doing the Maliboomer, which is one of these scary elevator rides that basically shoots you up 180 feet in 3 seconds, then drops you back down again. When they strapped me in (internal monologue: "OMIGOD! WHAT AM I DOING!? STOP!), this big plastic screen came down over my face. I asked the Friendly Attendant what it was for. "Oh," he said casually, "that's the scream shield, so they don't hear you in the hotel." Note to self: no more rides where scream shields are necessary. Ever.

Funny side note: Banksy, London-based guerilla artist extraordinaire, is someone that Edy and I both follow. We spend one entire night in London driving around Soho on Edy's bike looking for his latest guerilla art piece. Well, it turned out Banksy was in LA while we were there. In fact, he was at Disneyland. In fact, when we went with Char and Brent to line up for Big Thunder Mountain, it was closed, because Banksy had snuck in and put a life-size replica of a Guantanamo Bay prisoner, in an orange jumpsuit, right in the middle of the ride. Tooooo funny. And we totally missed it. Turned out he also had a warehouse show in LA starting Friday, which was a problem because we were going to San Diego. We were desperate to go to the invite-only opening on Thursday so we didn't miss it, and even emailed the infamous Perez Hilton to see if he knew where the show was...he claimed he didn't, but lo and behold, the next day there were pictures of Brangelina attending the opening on his website. Thanks ALOT, Perez.

Dani and Edy's California Adventure Begins

After having Drew and Annie over to help us consume the contents of the kitchen before we went on holiday, Edy and I stayed up, packed, had a one hour nap and left for the airport at 4:45 a.m. this morning to begin our California Adventure. We battled monster line-ups at US Customs (Edy was subjected to a "special" search) and took our America West flight to Phoenix. We chose America West because it was seriously cheap; cheap enough that we didn't mind going to LA via Phoenix...I guess everyone likes saving a little money because rapper-turned-actor Ice Cube was also on our flight. He walked by us in the departures lounge at YVR, and then he got off our flight in Phoenix and headed into a bar to wait until the leg to LA. I wanted to tell him how much I liked "Barbershop" (that was him in that, wasn't it?!) and Edy listened to Cube's masterpiece "Check Yo' Self" on his IPOD to get in the mood.

We feared for our lives a little bit coming into Phoenix; there was a big rainstorm, which are obviously unusual for Arizona, and it was a bumpy landing. Then, our plane from Phoenix to LA was delayed by an hour and a half due to the storms. This did not make for happy travellers, who hadn't actually gone to bed yet. Anyways, we finally arrived without incident and took a "Super Shuttle" from LAX, on those monster 6-lane-each-side freeways, to Anaheim, and the hotel I had booked for us, the Lemon Tree.

I hunted high and low for a cheap hotel in Anaheim that wouldn't be super scary, bug ridden, and 45 minutes from Disneyland. With the help of my new friend Trip Advisor, I picked the Lemon Tree. It SOUNDED good, but you never can be sure about what you read online. So I was biting my nails a little bit as Super Shuttle turned in the driveway.

It turns out I had nothing to worry about. We were greeted in the Spanish hacienda style lobby by Juan Carlos and Eugene. As Edy described it, the hotel decor looks a little like Trading Spaces meets Hotel Makeover, but it's cute, clean, and covered with lemon-themed cutesy stuff that reminds me of Mom's kitchen. They even have a big basket of Lemonhead candies sitting on the front desk. Juan Carlos gave us a quick tour of our room and the hotel before we settled in. Our room is quite big, again, Trading Spaces chic but cute and clean, and opens up onto a courtyard filled with flowers, a fountain, and a pool. We feel like we are staying in a villa. And for the price we paid (cheaper than any motel on Expedia or Orbitz), we feel we lucked out.

While Edy sat down to make use of the free wireless internet (of course he brought the laptop), I explored the hotel and had a chat with Eugene at the front desk.

"So, how do we get to Disneyland tommorrow," I asked. "Is there a shuttle?"

"Welllllll," he hedged. "The shuttle only runs up and down Harbour Boulevard, and we're a little off the beaten path for that. It's about 7 or 8 miles to Disneyland. That's too far to walk. So I say take a taxi. Or, we'll get you some cardboard and you can make a sign that says 'Need a ride to Disneyland' and stand outside the hotel on the road!"

We had a little talk about where would be a good place to go for dinner, or to explore tonight, on our only "non-Disney" night in Anaheim. Eugene gave us directions to his very favorite Chinese restaurant, that he goes to when he's "homesick" (he's Chinese), and then suggested if it was too adventurous for us we go to the Block at Orange, a big mall/street fair/entertainment area down the road in Orange, CA. He said it would be a good place to get something to eat, pick up some wine or beer, and come back to the hotel and relax in the hot tub. "Just don't forget to bring a beer back for me," he said.

That's what I like in staff. A little pluck and a little attitude! Oh, and he gave me a much needed hairdryer. So points for that, too. Tonight, we go to Orange. Tommorrow, The Fabulous World of Disney. Land. More from us later...


The Lemon Tree Hotel, from the back entrance. There is a more "swish" front entrance without the homey sign.

The fountain in the courtyard just outside our room, Room 113.


Edy got searched at YVR, I got searched by Air Marshalls before getting on the flight from Phoenix to LA, and lo and behold, our bag was opened for inspection and rifled through at LAX, too.


You step out the sliding glass door of our suite onto a little patio, where we have two little deck chairs and a small wooden table.


The pool and hot tub, which is in the courtyard outside our suite.


This is now the Encounter Restaurant at LAX.

That Darn Cat!

Edy hates Currie. Oooooooh, yes he does. While he told me it was OK if I wanted a cat, he would have nothing to do with her, and to be advised that if she did something to anger him he may try to jettison her out a window. Below is photographic evidence that in fact, Edy just hates that darn cat:

Giving Currie a driving lesson on the way to Victoria for Heather and James' wedding.

Having a discussion about her general badness at the window.

Currie in a paper bag, a present from Edy.

Currie on her new scratching post, which Edy bought off Craigslist and carried home to the West End on Skytrain and bus from somewhere around 12th and Commercial.

A Walk Down 7th

On Friday after work, and in spite of the heat wave, I wandered over to Main Street which is my new "cool place." After buying a yummy little black dress at Bodacious that looks like it was tailor-made for me, and a gelato at Bellagio's (Bad, I know, but it was so hoooot, and I'd already walked so faaaar), I hiked 7th Avenue (randomly chosen) from Main to Granville, just to get the lay of the land. I don't explore as much in Vancouver as I did when I lived in Montreal and London...maybe it's because I'm working and can't be bothered, I don't know, but it felt good to make the effort. Above: 7th and Manitoba.

A secret garden (okay, not that secret, it's a public allotment garden), also at 7th and Manitoba.


The view from 7th and Alder.
A room with a view at 7th and Oak.

Trashing Britney Is So Fun

OMG, check out this "Letter of Truth" from "Britney" to her "fans" posted on DListed:

Dear Frends and Fans,

Hi! How are y'all? Let's git down to it!

Y’all, pregnancy ain’t purty. I aint gonna lie. I’s feelin’ real fat these days. Already I cant wait to git myself down to a size 2. I hear Angelina Jo-lee is swallowing those Hoodia pills and that’s what Im gonna do! Im gunna git real hot. But with big boobs. You’ll see. Kev’s offered me $2 million if I can fit into that red leather catsuit I wore in mah video, you know the one. ‘Cept I cant figure out how this works, Kev don’t got that much money so Im supposin’ that he’s givin’ me $2 million of mah own money?

Lil’ P is so cute, y’all! I cant wait to have his little sister and dress her up real cute in sequins and pearls. And hotpants and tube tops, thats real sweet on little girls! Do they make four inch stilet-toes for young 'uns?

Kev calls me an “Emoshunal mess.” Right now ‘cause all them hermones goin’ thru my body or as Kev calls ‘em, Whore-moans! He’s so funny! Y’all, me and Jamie Lynne and my cousin Laura Lynne we all agree the baby should be named Brandi Lynne or Misti Lynne, I cannot decide!! Maybe even Taffi Lynne. I luv that name. Kevin says he don’t care. Something about signing checks? He is so simple! My mama calls him very simple minded. I think that means that he’s like, really smart.

Y’all I gots to go. Mah little Boo is climbing into the dogs food... again! Stay tuned for another season of Chaotic but wif me real preggers and look outs for mah new bubble gum scented perfume, Brit-Pop! And mah new line of Pork Rinds called Brit’s Piggy Chips! I’s comin out with foodstuffs now ‘cause I loves me some money! And cause...uh...I gots to support my husband..and that Shar Jackson.
Luv,
Brits

I love white-trash-false-eyelash-and- platform -flip-flops wearin'Britney way more than "I'm a Christian" Britney. Possibly even more than "I'm kissing Madonna" Britney, too.

Danger Cat

I bought Currie a little leash and a cat harness this weekend, so that she could roam around outside a little bit. Her harness, which goes around her head and her front legs and fastens on her tummy, is purple with little daisies on it and she loves it. In fact, she won't let me take it off her. Every time I try she cries and tries to bite me. So for the last two days she has been wandering around the house looking like a paratrooper cat or something. It's very cute.

Also found out that she loves Nip/Tuck. I had rented some DVDs this weekend and lolled around watching them a bit, and she was ALL OVER it. She really liked Dr. Troy and sat in front of the TV with her tail wagging the whole time...

Hooray Italia!

So Italy takes it, after a World Cup final that had me shaking by the end. I was closing my eyes on every penalty kick. It's sad that such an exciting game had to be marred by this whole Zidane field-rage incident where he headbutted Materazzi. Of course, the papers today are full of "Materazzi must have said something realllllly bad"-type commentaries, and FIFA implicitly acknowledged that Zidane was provoked, I think, by giving him the MVP. But you know what? I don't care if you're provoked. You're a professional athlete, you're playing in probably the most important game of your life, and you're paid gazillions of Euro to keep your temper. Whatever Materazzi said, he also said in the heat of the moment. But pros should know to let cooler heads prevail. So there's no excuse, as far as I'm concerned. OK, Materazzi said SOMETHING nasty, for sure, although he is denying he called Zidane a terrorist. Whatever. Zidane doesn't have the shinest record when it comes to being aggressive during games (he headstomped somebody in 1998). Just because he's retiring doesn't mean you give him the goddamn MVP when he's red-carded in the final and lets down his team. It was unprofessional. End of story. And it's detracting from what was a real victory for Italy.

Play the Zidane head-butting video game here.

Becoming Parents

As of next week Edy and I (well, me really, with Edy contributing via webcam and parental visitation) will become parents to a 10 week old baby kitten. Her name is Mercury Fiat Lemon-Piro. She is of course, Mercury, to go with the Ford and Lincoln Town-Cat I already have. The "Fiat" is because Edy said if she was going to be named after a car, it had better be an Italian car, plus Mercury is a boy's name in Italy and he says she's going to have gender issues (I'm sure the little "surgery" she is having this week won't help). We're just going to call her "Currie" though. I'll post pics as soon as she comes home from the shelter.

To rescue your own cat: http://www.forgottenfelines.ca

VIP Night at Playland

Thank God I can get VIP status SOMEWHERE in this provincial little town. Actually, me and about 5,000 other people got VIP status at Playland that night. But it made for a fun girls' night out. I managed to get Annie on her first ever roller coaster. The best was when she apologized to the children on the coaster for "having a bit of a potty mouth."


Rebecca at the Gladiator.
Hit-and-run.

I'm on the PHONE, people!


Lindsay and Annie, pre-carousel.